The day I decided to quit methadone at 12.5mgs, I called my wife. The first thing I said was, “It’s over”. My voice was cracking and she didn’t know what in the hell I was talking about. At the time, I couldn’t believe she didn’t know what I was saying. I hung up the phone and felt as if there should have been extreme excitement on her part. Hell, I thought she should have had fireworks planned to celebrate. Not the cheap Florida fireworks either, the true ones from South Carolina that go “BANG!”
It took me several months to get back to the point of knowing what I did, I did for me. I quit methadone because it is a God given gift, whenever we choose, to put addiction on its back. I celebrate largely alone because those who haven’t experienced detox don’t know. They can’t know I’m stronger because of it. It has made me and defined everything I’ve always wanted to be as a human. I wear it now because I’m not ashamed. I’m not anonymous because I am everyone. My name is Aashton, and I am not an addict!