I survived

I love the tv show on Biography called “I Survived”. I have loved it since the very first episode I watched a few years ago. I was watching a similar show on 48hrs tonight called “Live to Tell”. I saw these words scroll across the screen: “What if someone wanted you dead, but you-Lived To Tell”. That gives me goose bumps.

These shows are life in its rawest form. Usually, it’s one person on their own, against a foe or foes, and for different reasons they decide, “I’m fighting with my life, for my life”. Very simply they know they will live, or they will die fighting. How can a person not get chills from stories like that?

I remember reading of the massacre at the college in Virginia a few years back. I read how Seung-Hui Cho lined up something like 12 people, and shot them one-by-one-in a line. This story really bothered me too, and I thought of many, “if I were there” scenarios.

If I were there, there really is no way of knowing what I would have done. However, I believe that if I were any other number than the first to be shot, I would not be in that line of dead souls. I may very well have been dead, but my dead ass would have been outside that line. So I have always thought, “what was number seven thinking when he saw the first three get shot?”

Did number seven think hopefully the gun would jam, or that maybe the shooter would decided to take a pee-break, allowing him/her time for a getaway? C’mon now, Cho has just shot the first 1,2,3 point blank range- in the head- what the fuck are you still standing there for? Cho wasn’t even skipping around for confusion’s sake, he was killing them in order!

As I was saying, it usually takes one person with the overwhelming desire to “live”. I can relate to that particular part of their story’s now. I have the overwhelming desire to live, and not just live, but “live long and healthy”. It’s what we’re supposed to want to do as livers. I want to live for my wife, my kids, my family, my friends, and most of all- FOR ME.

There are a few things at the end of each show that I always watch for. The victims always verbalize “why” they think they survived. Some are as simple, yet poignant as, “I wanted to raise my kids” to as strange (or not) as, “I turned to look (in the direction of a mountain lion) and saw a transparent view of Jesus’ face”. And although the reasons differ from person to person, there is one thing that is always static. Each person says they no longer take life for granted.

By staring death in its eye, they all come to know how fragile life is. They appreciate every moment on this earth after that because one thing is for sure- we have one shot at our life (on earth), and then it’s wrapped. That’s a very powerful realization to have. It helps me to know that even though I wasted 18 years of my life, I could actually get more out of the remaining, than people not having been through this get in their whole life. Very, very positive thing to keep in mind through this withdrawal.

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