Better Than I Used To Be

Things happen sometimes in the weirdest ways. This morning on the way to work my wife said she heard a song that really sounded like me. All she remembered was that it had the words, “I’ve got a few more dances with the devil”, and that it was sung by Tim McGraw. I came in to work and punched it in to Google and the song, “Better Than I Used To Be” popped up. I kid no one when I say I had never heard this song before. Definitely another “Rocket Man” moment. It matches so closely to where I am, at this moment-I just had to post it here. Have I ever said that I love music?

Thx wifey, you’re the best! Almost made me cry.

ismelltherain

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9 responses to “Better Than I Used To Be

  1. Wow, I love moments like that. Awesome, and definitely a sign!! : )

  2. Can I ask a question on here to those of you on Methadone Treatment? I apologize if this is the wrong blog but I’m kinda sick of the Suboxone blogs..I’ve read that Methadone is harder to withdrawal from but my last Sub withdrawal was worse than Fentanyl withdrawal
    1. Have you tried Suboxone if so, your thoughts or your thoughts on why you’re against Sub?
    2. Are you allowed methadone take-home doses weekly or just weekends?

    • Personally, I have never tried Sub. One counselor suggested I think about switching over when I was @ 30mgs. I went home, talked it over with the wife, and ultimately decided against it. The reason: I already had methadone in my system and I didn’t want Sub throwing my body into more turmoil. I figured that I’ve been doing fine without it so why create one more hurdle.
      As for take-homes, I get 6 days worth of take-homes each week. At my clinic, it took me 1 year of clean UA’s and an “exception” to get 6 take-homes/wk. The exception was that I live over 60 miles from the clinic. So, if you live near the clinic, I would say it’s a minimum of 2 year wait w/ clean UA’s for take-homes. I do however remember hearing (from a counselor I think) that they give sub take-homes much quicker.

    • Jason – I’m not sure if you will see this but where I live you can get SUB from your reg doc or at a clinic – you can get a month of methadone take outs when you have been going 6 months and your drugs tests have been clean for 3 months…..then you have to keep them clean or you start dropping down to 2 weeks worth of take homes than 1 week than 4 days then 2 days than none until your drugs tests are clean again….make sense? But you don’t automatically go all the way back up to a months worth of take homes…..you build your way back up in the same way you lost them. The Sub. works the same way at my clinic. BUT if I were on sub I would just get from a private doctor so I just take it at home from day 1. But I know the rules are totally different depending on what state you live in and even what part of the country you live in. The states up north are even more strict than the states on Methadone than the states in south for example………

      • Thank you very much! Yes, I’m in Nevada and I’m getting the Sub from a private doctor monthly. It’s just not working like it used to with for the pain side of things, but keeping away the nightmares of withdrawal for sure. I took Methadone a year ago after running out of Subs while visiting NC, and I have to say that it was way better, cleaner feeling and no pain at all. Here in Las Vegas, I just can’t get to the methadone clinc at 5am every morning..not sure of their take home rules yet, but I’m finding out today. Thank you again!

      • You are so welcome…Although, the clinics do come with there own set of issues. I was at 160mg and now at 10mg some days – some days 8mg – and/or some days 5 mg. As I too have more physical pain, more than any other actual withdrawals anymore….I fought those demons a long time ago….but this damn physical pain kills me!!! My teeth even hurt at times.Good luck with everything – I am always documenting my own personal hell on my blog…some days are better than others for sure. I have come along way these last 4 years that is for sure….one great trick I do when the pain is really bad is literally lay on ice at night – it really helps. I will fall asleep on it!!! It calms those jumpy nerves that you feel and noone can see – my body literally feels like a magnet – pulsing and it drives me insane at times. But if I try and stay streched out and lay on ice it helps, I promise. If I ever get really stressed out because of the pain I drink some fresh ginger and wheat grass. Just a shot of it all ground up. It works. I look forward to hearing from you and I do wish you the best of luck = I know you can do it 🙂

  3. I just listened to the “Better than I use to be Song” WOW, that was great!! Not a huge country fan, but I must say….I loved the words and I too am far better than I use to be….a life without music would not be worth living.

    • Yeah, it isn’t my favorite type of music, but I go through phases. Right now I’m (in general) in a rap/r&b phase. I was thinking about why this is, and I think maybe it’s because (black) music is always about living. Sure, many times all the “raining” of money is over the top, but they genuinely look as though they are getting the most out of life. Once they make it big, there is no doubt they “live it up”. One of my favs right now is “Run This Town” by Rihanna, Jay z, and Kanye.

  4. OMG – I love the same type of music and maybe for the same reason – and the beat….but I also dig the blues….

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